Holy Week: Seven Days in the Sayings (Day 3 of 7) Passing The Torch

Guest Contributor: This post is from my Beautiful Wife and Best Friend, Mrs. Yasmin Philor!

John 19:25-27 (KJV)

Now there stood by the cross of Jesus his mother, and his mother's sister, Mary the wife of Cleophas, and Mary Magdalene. When Jesus therefore saw his mother, and the disciple standing by, whom he loved, he saith unto his mother, Woman, behold thy son! Then saith he to the disciple, Behold thy mother! And from that hour that disciple took her unto his own home.

Passing the Torch

Growing up I was the only child, both in my mind and in my being. I was spoiled and enjoyed spending time with my mother getting manicures and pedicures, shopping trips, and travelling. My mother enjoyed this also as it bonded us together even more, But April 1, 2004 that all changed. After 13 years of being conditioned as an only child, Pam, my mother, had a child after recently getting married. I was not happy. Yes, I used to ask for a little brother when I was three, but that’s just it. I was three years old. At 13, I enjoyed being the only child, getting all the attention, and being spoiled rotten, but most importantly I loved our bond and truly was going to miss it. As my brother grew older, I watched him, and my mother create a beautiful bond. At first, I thought that it was normal, but I soon realized that every parent has a different relationship with each of their children. As my brother grew older, I began observing his behavior and that little squirt got away with behaviors that I would have been reprimanded for. Of course, I had commentary. Then it dawned on me, there is a different relationship between mother-daughter than there is with mother-son. Jesus displays this in the text.

In the Jewish culture, the eldest son is responsible for taking care of his mother if something were to happen to her husband. At this point in the Jesus story, Joseph hadn’t been mentioned which means he was no longer on the scene. Because of Jesus’s crucifixion, he assigned John the responsibility of taking care of Mary, his mother, instead of relinquishing the responsibility to James his younger brother. One would question, why he would give the responsibility to his disciple instead of his brother. Perhaps Jesus believed in the slogan, “you are who you hang with” and knew that John would know exactly what to do. In Mark 9:31 it talks about how the disciples left once Jesus got arrested. This was interesting to me especially because disciple means to be a follower of something or someone and the disciples stopped being a follower when they became scared and possibly thought they too can be in danger. Except John, the real MVP, who was the only disciple present at the time of the crucifixion.

1. Actions speak louder than words: Have you ever been in a position where you needed the support of your friends and only one person showed up? I have. I attended Drexel University to obtain a master’s degree in Creative Arts Therapy & Counseling. During the program I was frustrated as we covered topics about racism, classism, sexism, and the current state of the world. I found myself feeling overwhelmed daily due to the discomfort of every conversation, but all of this was worth it once I graduated. I decided to celebrate this accomplishment with a party and out of ALL of my close group of girlfriends only one disciple, I meant friend showed up. They could’ve missed this accomplishment for numerous reasons, some of great importance, but all I knew is they weren’t there. I’m sure Jesus felt this same way when he was being crucified. His followers did not show up to be with him that day, not even his brother and Disciple James. The only disciple who was there was John, who took the role as a disciple very seriously. This showed that the individuals who we think should be there for us in the time of trouble, aren't always the ones who show up.
2. Pass the Torch: As mentioned earlier, Moms and their sons are two peas in a pod. I didn’t only see this with my mother, but also with my beautiful grandmother. She had her boys rotten. Whenever they needed her she was there, fully present, fully engaged, and ready to fix their problems, but as she got up in age the boys took a back seat as her daughters stepped up. Naturally women are caregivers, so it was to be expected. However, Mary’s children weren’t present during the crucifixion therefore, leaving Jesus to appoint John, the only present and obedient disciple, left to take care of his mother. When Jesus needed his family most they weren’t present. After all the late-night kickbacks, road trips, and miracle adventures such as walking on water, catering the feast with two fish and five loaves, and the healing of Blind Bartimaeus, they missed the most important miracle.

In closing, Jesus wants us to be disciples and followers for him. Mary was a widow, leaving the temple, the Community to take care of her. However, Jesus didn’t need the temple to take care of his responsibility during that time, but now during the crucifixion he sees one disciple, John. Jesus probably thought, "no one ever checks on the strong friend." That friend that always has it together. As a result, Jesus said Mother, behold thy son, son behold thy mother, reminding us that we each have a responsibility to take care of both our spiritual and natural families. So today, would you be there for Jesus? If so, behold the world, speak life and love, and be there when he needs you to.

Yasmin D. Philor
Yasminphilor@gmail.com
@krushin_onyou