Week 42: The Product of Pain

Scripture: Genesis 45:3-8

Then Joseph said to his brothers, “I am Joseph; does my father still live?” But his brothers could not answer him, for they were dismayed in his presence. And Joseph said to his brothers, “Please come near to me.” So they came near. Then he said: “I am Joseph your brother, whom you sold into Egypt. But now, do not therefore be grieved or angry with yourselves because you sold me here; for God sent me before you to preserve life. For these two years the famine has been in the land, and there are still five years in which there will be neither plowing nor harvesting. And God sent me before you to preserve a posterity for you in the earth, and to save your lives by a great deliverance. So now it was not you who sent me here, but God; and He has made me a father to Pharaoh, and lord of all his house, and a ruler throughout all the land of Egypt.

The Product of Pain

            Lance Armstrong once made a statement about pain that told us of our engagement with pain. He said “Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever.” Armstrong’s argument suggests that if we aren’t willing to deal with pain, pain can overtake us. Pain has the ability to control us, demobilize us and even disable us from being what God intended for us. While pain seems so difficult to bear, it also is the very source of most of our productivity. It is through pain that the limits of our strength are tested. It is through pain that we realize our abilities. It is through that pain that we begin to see God. This type of pain causes us to raise the white flag of surrender and give into the will and way of God, but the rough reality of this pain is that it is all too often multi-layered.

This is the feeling of losing a loved and your financial security in the same week. It’s the feeling of insecurity in one aspect of your life and learning of famine in the places of your stability. That is pain! Unfortunately, the people who know this pain and still find the strength to help others through this pain are members of the clergy. Clergy, also known as our On-Call superheroes, are our preachers, pastors, spiritual caregivers and spiritual directors. They serve as the presence of God in most of our lives. They pray with us, comfort us, motivate us, correct us, rebuke us but most of all, they love us. We rely on them in tragedy and are appreciative of all of their help in the moment of our need. They sacrifice their needs, and wants in order to ensure that we are cared for. Their care for us often extends beyond the expense of their own care. They are with us when we are weeping in the night and are often forgotten when the morning comes. Unbeknownst to us, we don’t often care enough for the pain in which they are bearing.

While many of us may find this to be abnormal, I would suggest to you that this lack of care is a regular occurrence in the lives of the people who serve as Clergy in our churches. While many think that they spend their days in prayer and sermon preparation, the reality is that they are typically serving members of their congregation in the capacities that we could never understand. As if the schedule is not difficult enough, Sunday always seems to come back too quickly. Between overseeing Church business, Hospital visits, office hours, family obligations, personal devotions, sermon preparation, jurisdictional responsibilities, counseling couples, preparing for baptisms, collaborating with community organizations, meeting the needs of the people, coming to the member’s rescue in tragedy and so much more; the pastor is often worn out. This is the recipe for Henri Nouwen’s Wounded Healer. They become masters at care for themselves just enough to ensure that they can care for the people who they are serving. There is often not enough time for self-care or quiet midday lunches. They try to vacation, but end up spending the entire time either preparing something for the church when they return or even worrying about how the church is running without them.

As if their schedules aren’t packed with enough, there is the reality of their own lives that bubble up around their responsibilities. The constant calls in the middle of the night, caring for an underprivileged loved one, balancing a full personal schedule while dealing with the full-time schedule of the church. With all of this on their shoulders, many clergy persons deal with the betrayal of the people of which they are leading. The very people, who call when their family members are in the hospital or when they are in need of support; are betraying them. The same people who vowed to stick by the pastor through tough times and rough decisions. The very same people who ask the pastor to preach the funerals of non-members or visit people who they don’t know at the hospital. These people are the ones who the O’Jays said will smile in your face, all the while they trying to take your place, the Backstabbers. They are all around the clergy and seem to rear their ugly heads whenever it seems like there is some significant progress towards the destiny God has called for. All the while the clergy continue serving and living in the midst of people who often love them only for what they can offer. It is also important for us to remember that this is a call from God and they never asked for this position. They find themselves in the midst of this trauma and pain from a vocation that they didn’t ask for. But if you are not aware of this and don’t have any example of what I may be discussing, I think you will find interest in the story of my dear brother Joseph.

Joseph is the favorite of his father’s children, but the most-hated among his brothers. His father, Jacob, modeled bad parenting skills by giving Joseph love, attention and a gift that caused much division among his brothers. Joseph was not in right relationship with his brothers because of the affection he received from his father. There was no hope for them to be in right relationship, because his father was the product of bad parenting and proponent of a bad fraternal relationship. As a result, there is pain experienced throughout the generations that have trickled down to the current generation. The reality is that we often set aside the issues of one generation and put on a posture of surprise when it appears in the next generation. If we can be honest and admit, some pains will only go away when we begin to address the issues.

Leading up to this text, Joseph is sold into slavery, and finds himself in the midst of some tumultuous moments that cause him to stop thinking about the dream that God had given him. He was falsely accused, thrown into prison, forgotten about and only considered of value because he allowed God to use him in the midst of his pain. His obedience and willingness to work through his position of pain caused him to be elevated to the position of governor, which is where Joseph is in this text. God entrusted him to be the Governor and gave Joseph the wisdom to prepare for a famine that would soon hit Egypt. Joseph carries out his position well, however, the text shows us that there is some residual trauma that comes from how he ended up in this position to begin with. He was sold into slavery by his self-hating, and jealous band of brothers, who only hated Joseph because he was favored by Jacob and, unbeknownst to them, he was also favored by God. He never asked to be the favored one. He never asked to be chosen. He never asked to be the one whom God chose the family to bow to. Joseph never asked for this life and this is often the posture that most clergy people take. The only decision that Joseph made was to follow God by any means necessary.

Joseph came to the realization that though it was through his brothers, it was God who orchestrated the plan. It is the plan of God to position us in places that seemed painful for the purpose of preserving life. That we may find ourselves in places of despair, but they often lead to the larger plan that God has for our lives. But this text shows us that the plan of God is often accompanied with Growing pains. Joseph is confronted with his trauma and reflects on all of the trauma that he has experienced. He then realizes that the pain that he has endured was the shaping agent that developed him into who God intended him to be. At that moment, though the memories of the pain still hurt and the scars remind of our traumas, we begin to produce purpose from the pain. That the pain of our past no longer holds our present hostage, controls the status of our future or transcend in the values of our next generation. 

When we see the purpose of our pain, our enemies are relinquished of the power that they once had over us. There are some people who have hurt us, but we don’t need an apology from because they didn’t have the power to do what they did to you. It had to be the plan of God to produce something bigger in you. They weren’t as powerful as we thought, because it was God who put all of this together, for the purpose of a better product in the end. The text says that Joseph realized that it was God who did it, so his brothers didn’t need to be upset.

There are other accounts of people just like Joseph who stand behind the Sacred Desk every week, whose pain has gone unnoticed and have pushed us toward our destiny. I’m appreciative of all who have answered the call of God, but there are some in particular whose answering has been a blessing to me directly. For all of the Josephs in my life, I am grateful. Without a Joseph, the famines in my life would’ve overtaken me. Their ministry may have been produced through pain, but the product of their ministry has blessed and built up this preacher. I’m grateful for:

·         Revs. John and Lula Baker’s love, prayerful support, guidance, being a safe place to land, willingness to pour information in others, always going beyond the call of duty, and your faithful pastoral leadership  

·         Rev. Dr. Frederick and Min. Natasha Faison’s the listening ears, providing opportunities for service, mentorship, modeling the balance of church-family and support

·         Rev. Dr. Wayne Croft’s prayerful advice, advocacy work, gift of cultivating ministers (both in the church and the academy), example of humility and scholarship (homiletics, liturgics and beyond).

·         Rev. Dr. Quintin Robertson’s counsel in the midst of turmoil, advocacy for your students and your prayerful support

·         Rev. Dr. Claudio Carvalhaes’s expansive and Socratic teaching method, love for theology and a love for all of God’s people

·         Bishop Patricia Davenport’s continued support, example of accountability in leadership, advocacy for the church and its leadership.

·         Rev. Dr. Karyn Wiseman’s love for the preached word and the development of  preachers

·         Rev. Dr. Morais Cassell and Rev. Dr. Craig Jackson’s prayerful mentorship, continued guidance and always being someone I can turn to in the midst of turmoil.

·         Rev. Trina Johnsten’s and Dennis Trotter’s ability to always go beyond the call of duty

·         Rev. Marianne Robbins’ ability to model pastoral care as a joy and not a burden; and you

·         Rev. Dr. Theresa Latini’s example of integrity in calamity

·         The support of Good Clergy friends (Ordained and Ordination-Tracked): Aimee Pakan Charryse Wright, Danielle Gilchrist, Jeff Harkins, Joel Pakan, Karol Mason, Kyle Boyer, Latrice Andrews, Lauren Heywood, Lawrence Claiborne, Mackenzie Alexander, Nick Christian, Nicole Webb, and Ralen Robinson
·         The Entire Marsh Family (a family of ministers) for their modeling of Ministry and Family, even when one’s ministry looks different than another’s ministry.

·         Yasmin D. Philor, a wife who ministers to me when I need to be ministered to, speaks healing into my broken places and walks alongside me as I journey along.

People like you have made it easier to address the pains of ministry while continuing to move forward towards the work of the Gospel.  So, if no one appreciates you on throughout this Clergy Appreciation Month, I want you to know that I appreciate you more than you will ever know.  You have encouraged me through some of life’s toughest transitions and I am eternally grateful. As you stand firm on your posts, I hope to encourage you with the words of a hymn that kept me going throughout my own pain. It says:

Be not dismayed whate’er betide,

God will take care of you!

Beneath His wings of love abide,

God will take care of you!

Through days of toil when heart doth fail,

God will take care of you!

When dangers fierce your path assail,

God will take care of you!

God will take care of you,

Through every day o’er all the way;

He will take care of you;

God will take care of you!