“When Death Comes Knocking for You.” By; Brandi J. Wardlow

“When Death Comes Knocking for You.” By; Brandi J. Wardlow

"There are only two truths that I can confirm. The first trust is that there is life, and the final truth is that with life, there is death. We, the existing, tend to look at the two as opposite functions. Death is a fate that many of us fret yet, a fate that we draw near to with each passing moment. The only difference between life and death is the assumption and matter of existence versus absence. We speak of death as a conclusion – as both finite and final. But, the problem with death is that the existing only witness from their point of view. We assume that there's no promise and continuance beyond the final breath. The problem with death is that the existing places too much emphasis on its fleshly finality – that we ignore the celebration that our flesh won't attend. We RSVP'd for our funeral the day we took our first breath outside of our mothers' womb, and we spend each second getting ready for the service. The matters of the dead aren't left to the living, but rather the dead themselves. The goal of the Christian is to hear 'well done' both my good and faithful servant. But, to achieve the goal, one must meet the goal. How have you practiced the law He left?

When death comes knocking for you, when it calls your name off the waiting list, when you arrive for your reservation, how will the existing send you off? How will God welcome you?"

I wrote this poem a few weeks following a funeral I had attended. A group of friends and I traveled down to Virginia to support a friend of ours after the passing of his father. It was my first time attending a funeral without having my own need to mourn or holding some grief. At first, it was weird. I’ve been blessed not to experience too many deaths, but for once, I was there to offer comfort and support other than carrying this sadness that death always seems to drop off. I come from a huge family that is known by whoever wherever we go. So, the art of every pew filled in mega-churches isn’t perplexing to me. Actually, the opposite is. But, I guess, for once, I could take funerals in outside of my own experiences and personal connections.

Considering my fair share of funerals, good things are always said about the dead. Looking back, is it because it's expected? Like, who really comes to funerals and say, "Yeah, Brandi was very toxic." I noticed that a huge indicator of a good, lived life is the number of people that attend. Like, the larger the crowd, the more lives you impacted. And while those aren't really accurate reflections or indicators of a life worth honoring and celebrating, the one thing that hit me on this day in March was that death is going to happen. There will or should be a home-going service in your remembrance. And quite frankly, the arrangements of your funeral isn't really up to the living. It's actually up to you, the dead. The people who come, the people who mourn, the things they say – isn't really about them but about YOU. It's about the life you lived. So, after some time and taking Mr. Gibbs' funeral to reflect – the only thing I could think was, "When death comes knocking for you, when it calls your name off the waiting list when you arrive for your reservation, how will the existing send you off? How will God welcome you?"

Well Done

I write this as “Well Done” by Tye Tribbett plays in the background. During the bridge, Tye begins speaking, and he shares, “But let’s be mindful as we pursue our dreams and as we pursue our goals that at the end of all this, the reality is I’m living my whole life just to hear two words, and that’s well done.” For years, I have also come into this agreement that I am living my whole life just to hear two words, and that’s “well done.”

The concept of “Well Done” is introduced in Matthew 25. The chapter starts with the Parable of Ten Virgins and then shifts to the Parable of the Talents [AMP]. In summary, a master gives his servants his possessions based on their own ability and sent them on their journey. Two of the servants went, gained a profit, and also received a return on the investment. However, one servant hid the possessions instead. When the master returned, he rewarded the two servants by saying, “Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful and trustworthy over a little, I will put you in charge of many things; share in the joy of your master [Matthew 25:21 AMP].” But the master turned and said to the final servant who was afraid to lose his master’s possession, “You are wicked and lazy,” and therefore, took the talents away from him. I fully appreciate the MSG’s version of this, where it states, “If you knew I was after the best, why did you do less than the least?” The parable ends with a moral of the story approach in Matthew 25:29 and states that those who value and adequately use God’s blessings and gifts more will be given and an abundance supplied. But those who do not do will have their talents removed and will be sent into the outer darkness where there is a place of grief and torment and the weeping of sorrow and pain.

Although the concept of “Well Done” isn’t necessarily associated with death, many Christians, such as myself and even Tye Tribbett, note that this life we are living is looking for the reward of hearing, “Well Done.” For myself, I imagine it’s almost like a rite of passage. As if the day God calls me home, I’ll be in a long line of other souls. After waiting, Saint Peter will get to my name and read a long list of Brandi’s life’s actions. I’ll feel some sort of guilt as he reads off those mistakes and bad choices. Those times that I let the ‘old Brandi’ or the ‘other Brandi’ get the best of me. Then, he’ll open the gates. I’ll waltz on into Heaven and say, “Whew Chile, I made it.” I’ll see God sitting on this throne, and He’ll say, “Well Done.” Imaginative thinking, I know. However, imagine in this story, God says, “If you knew I was after the best, why did you do less than the least?”

I often consider my “purpose” on this Earth or God’s will for my life. Often times, I think “impact” looks like this big, grand gesture that the whole world will recognize and notice. For instance, as a poet or writer, I have fallen into the trap of believing that for my words to “touch” someone, I need a huge platform. I remember publishing my first book in 2015. I haven’t necessarily written anything since. I struggled for years following my publishing debut because I believed I wasn’t using my talent or gifts. A part of me also felt that God had stripped me from my gifts, much like the Master in the parable. However, something changed in me in 2016. I went from being a more secular-based writer to unintentionally writing “for” God. At first, I didn’t accept it. This wouldn’t get the audience or crowd that I needed to make an “impact,” I thought. But, by 2019, I realized that to get back to my passion, I had to accept not only the gift God wanted me to use but how He wanted me to use it. Which brought me here, as a writer for the Sacred Desk. I stopped thinking I needed to have this large audience and this grand recognition to make the impact I thought my purpose called for.

I bring up this sentiment because many of us fall into that trap of thinking that impact or purpose is something for the whole world to see. We believe that to be purposeful or to make an impact, we need to reach thousands or that we need to be more than what, who and whose we are. But, the reality of that is that we are called to make do with what we are given just as the Master expected of his servants in the parable. The more we make use of what is given to us, the more we will receive to continue receiving a return on the investment we are making each and every single day. I spent almost four years wasting the possessions of my Master (God) because I didn’t want to use it for His will but rather my own. In short, God was after the very best for me, and in those years, I did absolutely less than the least.

The world has many of us thinking that our egos need more than what we gain to have a certified impact. We forget that each of us is equipped with our own particular gifts and will walk our own specified journey to use these gifts. Our gifts are absolutely distinct. Some of us are more forgiving than others or more empathetic or compassionate. Some of us give better advice, while some of us are just greater listeners. Even when we share the same gifts, our style and approach are what make unique. Consider the writers for the Sacred Desk. All of us have our own approach and style that touches someone differently. It does not mean we aren’t making an impact or aren’t serving our purpose, but rather God is using us in a particular way to touch a specific person. The other side to this is that we aren’t always notified of said impact or purpose. However, that’s not our record to keep, but God’s alone. Likewise, the overall measurement and goal of our good deeds or our good works are not for the praise that many of us yearn for but rather God himself. That whatever we say, whatever we do and how we live is a testament to God and the work He is doing in and around us daily.

It’s as simple as Philippians 2:1-18. We are called to not do anything from selfish ambition or conceit. We are supposed to think of others more than ourselves. Like Jesus, we are asked to empty ourselves as a servant and humble ourselves, doing everything in the name of God. So, that everyone will exalt and revere God. We are told that when God works in us, it is for His will and His pleasure. We are not supposed to grumble nor dispute, but to shine as lights in the world.

Living as lights in the world comes with more than just the glorified talents and gifts that we all have. For instance, while writing is my obvious talent – the way that I live my life (or should live my life) is where my light shines (or should shine) the most.

As always, the Bible gives those simple “how-to” instructions on being a light in this world:

·        Ephesians 4:29-32: Only speak what is helpful and will build others up according to their needs

·         Colossians 1:10-11: Bear fruit in all works and grow in the knowledge of God

·   Proverbs 3:5: Trust in the Lord with all our heart and not leaning on our own understanding

·      Mark 12:30-31: Love the Lord with all our heart, soul and mind and extend this same love to one another 

·        Romans 12:1-2: Do not conform to this world, but be transformed through the renewal of our mind, therefore, practicing discernment

·         Proverbs 16:1-20-30: Commit all of our plans to the Lord

·         Matthew 6:33: Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness

·         Ecclesiastes 12:13: Fear God and His commandments

·         1 Thessalonians 4:11-12: Live a quiet life which minds its own affairs

·         1 Timothy 4:12: Set an example in speech, conduct, love, and faith

We are reminded twice in 1st Peter that we ought to live such a “good” life. First, as stated in 1 Peter 3:16, that when we are slandered in the name of Christ, our slanderers will be put to shame. For it is better to suffer for doing good than to suffer at God’s hand for doing evil. Secondly, as stated in 1 Peter 2:12, that we must live so much of an honorable life that those who judge our good works will not only see our Good deeds but glorify God on the day of judgment.

I sat in Mr. Gibbs’ funeral that day, realizing that funerals are not the responsibility of the living “left” behind, but the dead that we are mourning or instead celebrating. We should live in such a way that we are celebrated when we depart. Not because saying good things about the dead are almost silent required, but because we should live in such a way that foul words or negative speak doesn’t encompass us whatsoever.

When death comes knocking for you, when it calls your name off the waiting list, when you arrive for your reservation, how will the existing send you off? How will God welcome you?" Will God say, “Well done, my good and faithful servant” or, “If you knew I was after the best, why did you do less than the least?”

Be lights in the world, brothers and sisters!

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